Updates updates updates…

I applied for SSDI yesterday which is Social Security Disability Insurance/Income which means if approved, I will get a monthly payment to aid with my bills & whatever else I need the money for.

The payments are usually very small, which means I’ll have to budget immensely (My bills would about $180 a month alone)

There’s much paperwork involved and I very well can be denied.

I’ve been keeping up with someone on Twitter recently who has been fighting her SSDI case since 2009.

Needless to say, it’s not as easy as it looks, and it sucks that the people who actually need the assistance aren’t getting it because the people who want to be lazy and live off the government for the rest of their lives all have it.

I have a valid medical condition that I didn’t even ask for, as well as mental disorders that I didn’t really ask for either.

Well, I sent in all the paperwork today, and well, the 120+ day (that’s 3 months+ waiting game begins.

Sometimes it can be determined in as little as a month or two, but really, all I have to do now is wait.

Wait wait wait.

Keep you updated!

Dear Blog,

You’re 10 years old today.

TEN.

I “gave birth” to you sometime in 2002.

For a while, you didn’t even have a name. You were basically known by my incredibly lame username I had for LiveJournal. You were just a locked up space where I would let my feelings go because physically talking about them were difficult. You were updated often while I was in school, in all hours of the night when I gained internet access of my own for my 18th birthday. I would sit in my closet and just write, the clonky CRT monitor glowering back at me.

(Yes, my first computer was in my closet, as I was in a smaller room than I am in now.)

I told you things that I am now finally becoming comfortable talking about publicly, I don’t feel afraid about being judged anymore.

2008 came and I deleted you, started over. I needed a clean slate. I made March 16th your ‘official’ birthday.

Eventually, you gained a name. I gave you the name of ‘Cinnamon Bubbles’, from a inside joke. Of course, I’d tell you what the joke is, but then it wouldn’t be a joke any more.

You were hosted on several blogging platforms before WordPress became Mummy’s personal (and permanent choice.)

Years went by, and I started reaching out to other people like me. Bloggers. Bloggers came in every colour, shape, form, background and I embraced them all.

I blogged a lot. I blogged everything.

October 2011, something snapped in my brain and blogging stopped completely. I suddenly hated it, I hated everything (and everyone!) to do with it.

I deleted people off of social networks, deleted my blog (of course, backing it up first, should I choose to come back…) and fell off the blogging earth.

2012 was rung in with the intent of recharged energy, a ‘new start’ to blogging.

And this new start brought new friends, new features.

Dearest blog, you are fun to be around, but you will never be a chore.

I enjoy you blog, but sometimes, people need their space.

This is why I instilled¬†NO BLOG RELATED THINGS¬†on weekends. You have my attention 5 days of the week for a couple hours each day, I think that’s enough. For the weekend, I’ll focus on friends’ blogs. Give them some of my attention.

Of course, I can walk away from you whenever I want, dearest blog, because you don’t control my life.

(I’ve seen this happen to some people, in which they have shut down their blogs.)

You’re just an outlet dearest blog, and that’s all you’ll ever will be.

Of course, don’t get me wrong blog, you’ve introduced me to a wonderful community.

In light of all this word vomit…..

HAPPY TENTH BIRTHDAY, BLOG!